motown mimi

Performer’s idea of fun: talking (at great length, of course) about teaching some nubile young woman how to play the Mendelssohn violin concerto.

* * *

There’s a lot that would be more fun, such as dancing to motown.

* * *

I’m practicing.

If you want to picture me, imagine any of these songs (in the versions I’ve given the URLs for — not the best versions ever, but just the best I could find with a quick search) blaring from my computer, and me attempting in my very feeble way to dance to them:

“My Girl”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ltRwmgYEUr8
If you only have time for one, you MUST MUST listen to & watch this “My Girl.” It’s divine.

“Since I lost my baby”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xUwkBwPoNXE

“Mustang Sally”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lQKmrQfxRHQ

“I heard it through the grapevine”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xLq1UbKdSVc&feature=related

“Satisfaction”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gGbOYIo7SD4

“Stop in the name of love”
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S_PKqgzSXAM

“Wait till the midnight hour”
http://video.aol.com/video-detail/guysebastian-wait-till-the-midnight-hour-part-one/253475416

* * *

SDF (aka 31 in the last post, but I think I’ll stick with his original name, SDF) likes to dance to motown, and that’s what our date is for next Saturday.

Knowing that I’ve been taking swing-dance lessons and don’t really know how to do the kind of free-form dancing people do to motown, he suggested that we do both. It was also his notion that because our dancing styles are so different, we should practice first, before we go out on the town to dance. So we’ll do that in my living room.

* * *

The idea that I have a ‘dance style’ is preposterous. As all my ex-roommates (some of whom read this blog, and all of whom have given me dance lessons at one time or another) and many of my friends can confirm, I’m a lousy dancer. It’s just that I love to dance… I started taking swing only a few months after my New-Era dating started, with the thought that one of these days I might need it.

My swing-dance teacher, a competitive ballroom dancer, is a doll, and we really enjoy one another’s humor — but he has never told me I’m a good dancer. Why should he? It wouldn’t be the truth. I do improve, but in almost unnoticeable increments.

* * *
Dancing is really important to SDF. I think he would probably say, if asked, that he would like a woman who enjoyed dancing, not necessarily a woman who’s a fantastic dancer.

* * *

But what dancing man wouldn’t rather dance with a fantastic dancer?

* * *

Most men who think about me and dancing in the same moment assume I’m a good dancer, because I look as if I should be: I’m active & lively, sort of slender, I’m not awkward, I usually look all right in my clothes, and I’m rather feminine-looking.

I’m not being modest, however, if I assure you that I’m by no means, not at all, a good dancer.

I do have enthusiasm, energy, and sticktoitiveness: I’ll keep dancing until I get better.

* * *

I had stopped my swing-dance lessons temporarily, but I’ve scheduled an emergency dance class for Friday. We’re going to dance to motown, even if that isn’t what my teacher usually does. I’ll feel so much better if I know just a few moves I can make, just a few. I can’t become an expert over night, but if I can master a few steps, I’ll enjoy myself a lot more.

* * *

You’ll notice that I began this post talking about Performer.

Really, it’s a bad habit, contrasting each new man favorably to the previous one: Rolly didn’t want intimacy, I told myself (it was indeed the case), so isn’t it great that Performer does? Rolly didn’t like to telephone, so isn’t it great that Performer calls me every night?

And now I’m doing it again: Performer was only ‘fun’ on rare occasions, and then only on his own terms, so isn’t it great that SDF likes to dance??

* * *

You see the problem.

I’m already constructing SDF as an improvement on Performer, when I’ve only spent about 2.5 hours in his presence.

I don’t know the guy.

I don’t know his romantic past — we didn’t talk about that at all, on either side — though my googling suggests to me that there have been two marriages, which is fine.

I don’t know his personality, his strengths, his weaknesses, his anything except his size. I wouldn’t even recognize his voice if he called.

We might very well be completely unsuited to one another. We may already have exhausted our common conversation. We live about an hour-and-a-half apart. This may be a two-date or perhaps three-date relationship. Its future may be very short.

* * *

Okay, well, all that’s impossible to say right now.

But dancing is fun; I enjoy it, even when I’m lousy, as I mostly am. So I’ll just think about enjoying myself for one evening: not only not-making-a-fool-of-myself, but actually having a good time.

Really, dancing can be joy, and it’s something I want to do as much of as I can before — well, you know, before I’m utterly decayed.

* * *

Tomorrow night, I’ll have another session with The Temptations.

* * *

UPDATE
Wednesday evening

dancing to the Supremes & ‘Baby Love’
on this site — http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=23UkIkwy5ZM — there are people dancing in the background, but they are so dreadful –
no vitality. My dancing has more horsepower to it.

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